Everything you take into your mind programs you. In the past, I thought of the matrix as a construct created by others to imprison and control us. In actuality our minds are the matrix and they are being programmed at all times. The key is selecting our own programming. Right now most people ingest what is readily made available. Education, religion, television, politics and social programming of all sorts in mainstream society are the default programming and work for those who wish to control us. Through their programming they control what we think about, how we process the information and the action we are likely to take.
The states and federal government create the requirements and practices for school. The way teachers are trained, schools are ran and children are taught is all for control of the masses. The history that is taught is not an accurate representation of the past and was created to control our perception. They removed critical thinking and replaced it with testing and regurgitation. Teachers are being pressured to teach to the standardized tests. Almost every child nationwide is indoctrinated with this education. This is the foundation they build their lives on and shapes their minds. Most will never question this foundation.
All the major religions require its followers to accept certain truths without question. Once these truths are accepted, they limit reality and how information is processed. Most Christian do not look into truths from the muslim faith and vice versa. Most religious people will not contemplate information that seems to clash with their religious beliefs. Now they are closed to any other realizations and growth and everything has to framed through their matrix of religion.
Mainstream media is used to further program people. It gives political information, influences social norms and molds the minds of children and adults to support the continuation of the status quo. Media determines what people wear, eat, hate, love and what they do. The people who have accepted the program help keep those who are rejecting it in line. They tell others what is possible and what they should be doing according to how they have been programmed. So you have to want the America Dream and follow these systems put in place or you are crazy. They have even developed mental illness as a way to label and control people. Once people accept these labels, they believe the problem is them. Often it is just the programming malfunctioning but those who want to control us cannot afford questioning of the program.
PROGRAM YOU OWN MIND
Chose the programming yourself and you control your matrix or your mind. What we allow in our minds, we manifest. Those who wish to control us attempt to control every aspect of what goes in our minds and therefore control the matrix we create for ourselves. If they create the building plans then they control what we build. However, if you let go of everything you think you know and begin to take all information in objectively and judge it for its validity then you can begin to program your own mind. Reading different books, listen to different teachers and philosophers and judge them on their own merit not based on the default programming you have been given. You will begin to let go of outdated programming and replace it programming that helps you create the reality you want. And this never stops. You will continue to grow and update your programming time and time again and learn what it means to be an infinite being. There is no end to growth and learning and there is no absolute right or wrong. It is all based on how we program our minds. Our mind is our matrix, it creates our limits and our realities. Is the programming your mind is running designed to limit you or free you?
This was an event I had last year with a group of midwives and the title of a chapter in my book Sista Sista: A Woman's Guide to Self. Available for purchase on the homepage.
March is recognized as Women in History Month and feminism as a "movement" has been a hot topic on social media for a while now. I am slow to call feminism a movement because I am not sure of the goals and shared values. One reason for this is because it is mostly a social media movement as most people who talk about it do very little in the physical world to actually move it forward. I know the wage gap and violence against women are major concerns for valid reasons. I also notice a lot of social issues being brought to the forefront. Women do not want to be judge differently for the same behaviors and actions as men. Inequalities we see between men and women in society need to be addressed but I preferred to focus on the root of problems and not symptoms and in my opinion feminism is only addressing symptoms. Also women need to focus on their role and how they can use the power they have to level the playing field rather than demanding a system created and ran by men to allow them to share in the power.
VIOLENCE AGAINST WOMEN
Violence against women is unacceptable so bringing attention to it is a great start but encouraging women to learn to defend and protect themselves is the easiest and most empowering way to address violence against women. The system is not going to change and waiting for public opinion to change is irresponsible. Women must arm themselves with the proper tools to discourage violence against them. Learning to avoid situations where they are more likely to be victimized and recognizing the signs of violent attitudes are also good tools. Feminism seems to instead have women forcing their way into risky situations and demanding not to be oppressed or attacked. In large numbers as a demonstration this can be powerful but as an individual or a small group is dangerous. No one ever deserves to be abused but placing yourself in harms way to make a point is irresponsible and foolish.
THE WAGE GAP
The wage gap is another symptom feminism addresses but at the end of the day women accept lower pay. Women have to know their worth and being willing to sacrifice to prove it. Why would you complain to a sexist system about sexism? Why would expect men to give up their power? Why not instead focus on empowering each other. Women hiring other women and using the services and products of women ran companies. Empowering women should be in the mission of every business a woman owns. To beg men for power and acceptance is to admit they are more powerful!
Fighting for social acceptance of behaviors is pointless is my opinion. We can instead teach women to be confident and secure in their actions and choices. Women cannot demand that people see their personal choices as good or not form opinions about them because of their choices. A woman is free to have a lot of sexual partners, wear revealing clothing or participate in behaviors viewed a normal for men but frowned on for women. However, she must also deal with the consequences of the behavior. No one has to protect her feelings and she must be strong to challenge the stereotypes. Social opinion changes when people are ready and cannot be forced and its a waste of energy to make this a priority.
HOW DO WOMEN CHANGE SOCIETY
Women change society by being women as nature designed us to be. Patriarchy has tricked women into devaluing their natural gifts. Feminism has many women trying to prove they can do anything a man can do instead of embracing being a woman. Many are chasing qualities and accomplishments of men, which means they see men as more valuable and powerful. Our womb is actually our power, we give life to the world and can nurture our children to be anything we want. Instead women have devalued the power of motherhood in order to prove they can be just as valuable outside the home. So women if and when they have children rush back to work sending their children into the sexist system oppressing them to be educated and nurtured. This is counterproductive to say the least. What sense does it make to let sexist ideology, people and systems mold your children's brain. Then their sons and daughters grow up to continue the very system that feminism is fighting. This is a horrible strategy.
Instead what if mothers came together to educate their children in homeschool collectives ensuring that girl and boys are encouraged to participate in all activities equally. Now their children do not buy into men being better equipped for science and math and women arts and services. This leads to social change as the boys learn girls can be valuable in every area of life and girls learn the same. If women focused on socializing their children in a way that ends sexism then it could be solved in one generation. Imagine that! The one thing patriarchy has framed as a weakness of women is actually our power. As long as your enemy can make you believe your power is your weakness, he will always have the upper hand. Its time for women to take back their power and embrace their divine gifts. But many women are running from this truth and feminism seems to reinforce the devaluing of our wombs. This is why I say women's power is not feminism and see feminism as an obstacle to the empowerment of women. Just another perspective. Peace and Love.
Mass incarceration has been noted as a factor in different problems facing the so called black community. However when I mentioned it being a factor in how men relate to and view women on twitter some of the responses prompted me to write this.
PRISON CULTURE IN MEN
Many black men have been to jail, have friends or family members who have been to jail or listen to music that glorifies it. In prison men are forced to get their needs met by other men. Emotional, mental & spiritual needs all have to be met to maintain some sense of sanity. The bonds made there are vital but does this undermine the natural balance of the female/male relationship? Do men then consciously or subconsciously reduces women to physical objects. Is sex the only value men see in women? Does this cause men to feel closer and more comfortable with men in everything but sex? Do men become the preferred confidant and friend? I made the statement that besides sex men are homosexual in every other way. A relationship is more than sex so if you only use women as a type of concubine but get all other needs met by men then is that not a form of homosexuality?
I know men and women associate with the same sex at certain times for certain reason but it seems as if today they only associate with each other in a sexual relationship. The valuing of women as friends and support is nonexistent. I do not believe prison culture is the only reason but it could be a factor. The behaviors and culture adopted to survive in prison do not disappear once a man is released. This culture is then passed on to others. Men are ridiculed for wanting to be around women if they are not having sex. Little boys observe this and mimic the behavior. They are pushed to sexualize girls if they like to hang around them. When I say sexualize I mean told they have a crush or pushed to see her as a girlfriend instead of a friend. Why is this? Do we not believe women and men cannot be friends and therefore socialize our youth to act this way?
Women and men are a natural balance for each other. We are not opposing forces but complementary. We often do have different perspectives and responses to situations and can help grow each others' perspectives but with the division that is being pushed, learned and embraced, both sides are becoming radicalized and undervalue the other side. Society is out of balance. This became obvious when I suggested men need to be friends with women before expecting to have sex and the opinion of men was they are not going to hang around a woman if they did not see a possibility of sex. My response to that is if you are not willing to be a woman's friend without any motivation then what qualifies you as being a possible mate? This was very disturbing to me and shows many men do not see value in women without sex.
We also know that women usually become emotionally attached after having sex and may act insecure and then men complain about that. When the women sleeps with a man before trust and friendship is developed then she is insecure about the relationship and how he feels. However, if a mutually beneficial friendship is established first than the trust naturally forms and if the chemistry is there then it will progress to a more intimate relationship. This helps maintain balance in the relationship rather than a woman feeling completely exposed and vulnerable with a man who hasn't proven he could be a friend or was even interested in it. However women sleep with men to keep their attention and it usually end bad for both parties.
Side note: The "Friend Zone" that men hate is not a friend at all. It seems to be a place women keep men they wish to use for favors and benefits. THIS IS NOT A FRIEND! A friendship is mutually beneficial. However if you are only hanging around because you are hoping to have sex then you are not a friend and deserve the "Friend Zone". Friends do not have ulterior motives.
CHALLENGE TO MEN
In your circles, observe if there is any talk of women that does not place value on sex. Do you all ever discuss women as truly friends or even think it is possible? Is it something you even want? Is there any value of having women friends for receiving a balanced perspective? Do you yourself only value women as sexual objects? Where did you learn this from? Are men with unhealthy or skewed views of women creating the culture in your circles? There are several reasons for this to be a trend in society but we have to look at mass incarceration as one of them.
The events we continue to see unfold on a daily are reruns from the past. Niggas are literally falling into the same traps as our foremothers and forefathers. Everything I do and say I do from a place of love but at times love is tough. It doesn't do us any good to be politically correct or be considerate of outside feelings and views. So what mistakes are repeating?
Integration was the downfall of unity in our culture. While the funding was not equal, we did not understand that we would not receive fair treatment in "white" spaces. We thought all we had to do was get in and prove ourselves to be treated equal. We actually ended up having to beg for the shit we once had because we had to provide it for ourselves. Our doctors, lawyers, education, restaurants, stores and everything else was lost to integration. We begin to look at our own services and products as subpar and enslaved ourselves to the system. We made ourselves second class citizens who could not provide for ourselves or who chose not to provide for ourselves.
We are still begging this same system to educate us out of oppression, give us the same opportunity in business and fairly police us. History shows that this cannot happen in this system. Niggas are still on the bottom of the totem pole and more lost and dependent than ever. It is time to do for self!
We continue to look to outside authorities to tell us what is best for us, how to fix our problems and for validation. They do not have our experience and by the comments and atmosphere of today it is obvious they do not want to know. We have to begin to take pride in ourselves, appreciate ourselves and see the value in ourselves. We are the authority on us. We can educate our babies the best. We can be more responsive to the needs of our community and we can solve and heal our wounds the best.
Do not allow outside authorities to continue to weigh in on how we should heal, build and love ourselves. It is time we create a culture that is our own. It has to be for us by us because contrary to what they push we are different. Our cultures are different and what best suits us is different from what best suits others. This is why we fail the most in the current system from school to employment. This is why we fill the prisons. Its time to take back our power and be our own authority.
REFORMING THE SYSTEM
They will never allow us to change the system and take away their power. This is why they created poli-tricks. They make us believe that voting can change our situation but how long have niggas been voting? What progress has been made? There is no reforming a system built on the enslavement of your people. This system is functioning the way it was built to function. It is miseducation through school and media that makes people believe the system ever worked for us and will ever work for us. It is an illusion to think we have allies in this system when all politicians have been bought. For their own careers they have to go along to get along.
Not to mention that anytime niggas have built anything in this country for themselves it has been destroyed by the government or the destruction sanctioned by the government. Black Wallstreet and M.O.V.E were literally bombed. The Blank Panthers and all human rights organizations were infiltrated and destroyed or taken over by puppets. They then renamed it civil rights and still don't treat us as human. There is no reforming the system! Stop believing the hype.
WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER
No we are in this particular situation by ourselves. Others may have similar issues but the root is not the same. The manifestation is not the same and therefore the solutions will not be the same. Also because of the miseducation given to everyone we are seen as inferior. This is why we see wypipo thinking they know more about the problems and solutions in our community (or lack thereof). They continue to deny our experience and justify our mistreatment. They want to stay comfortable in their American Dream and not acknowledge that it has been a nightmare for us and the only way for us to be successful in this system is to reject ourselves, our culture and our people. No one who is truly trying to uplift our people will be allowed to rise to power or fame. This is why they pick our leaders for us. This is why they only pump certain people in our faces and let them grace the covers of magazines, start social movements and speak on large platforms. Do not be fooled, these people are not for us, they cannot be and keep their status. Any statement they make that seems to be for us has been pre approved. Never let your enemy (who runs the media) pick your leaders!
Also all POC are not our allies as many of them see us as inferior and while they are also treated like niggas in the system they still wish to distance themselves from niggas. They usually are trying to prove they are not like us.. And let's be honest a lot of our culture has become destructive. Who would want to be associated with the fuckery that has become our community. The dysfunction that has followed us from slavery and is at an all time high right now. The "Black American" experience is unique and that binds us together. This is the first reason for our oppression and must be the first issue we address if we are to make any significant change to our situation.
We have to stop bleeding for everybody when no one bleeds for us. We have to stop waiting for a system made to enslave us to free us. We have to stop trying to fit into a barbaric culture that only knows scarcity and oppression. They do not celebrate our differences they want to silence us. They want us to be complacent in our oppression and ditch our culture for theirs. Building our own is not about exclusion but it ain't about inclusion either. It is about building what is best for us without the thought of other people's feelings and views. No one cares about our feelings and thoughts so why we still want to be the dumb muhfuckas trying to appease everyone. Why are we afraid to offend people who don't give a fuck about offending, jailing and killing us. Fuck being politically correct. Stop editing yourself and selling yourself short to appease people who don't give a fuck rather you live or die. Man and woman the fuck up and lets make real change so our babies are not in the same situation in 20 year. Peace and Love beautiful souls.
Peace & love beautiful souls...welcome to my thoughts. This is just a introduction to me and how I see the world. I don't know about yal but I am tried of political correctness keeping us from having real conversation and coming up with real solutions to fix the world around us. I am not a politician and therefore have no need for political correctness. I am not here to spare anyone's feeling or to make anyone comfortable. This is me sharing the problems and issues I see facing the world. Feel free to leave comments expressing your reactions and views. Yes you may be offended, what I say may piss you off or at least make you uncomfortable but it is not until people feel uncomfortable that they begin to make change. No one should be comfortable with the way the world is. And I am here to shine a light on the flaws I see and share the solutions I feel can work. I will also probably vent about other things. I am a complicated, deep thinking, deep feeling woman and I have no fear in my heart. It all comes from a place of love and wanting to create a better reality for our children but we first must face this reality and tell it how it is. I hope you enjoy, hate and grow from this. I have a twisted sense of humor and sarcasm is my mode of operation. I don't take myself too seriously so understand I am never angry only slightly annoyed. I've found my happy place. Namaste.
Peace & love. I share my thoughts in hopes of helping you find your own. They may take many forms from poetry to essays. However the spirit moves me I will share. Thanks for taking the time to read my thoughts & experiences. This is my truth.