Merriam-Webster defines gender as the behavioral, cultural, or psychological traits typically associated with one sex. “Typically associated” does not mean limited to but this seems to have been lost in translation. Instead of saying men and women do not have to display any traits typical of their sex, people want to raise their children gender neutral. In my opinion this is more damaging than helpful. As parent it is our job to help children cultivate their identity and biological sex is a part of our identity as much as our skin, height, hair and all other physical traits. A human with a penis is a man and a human with a womb is a wom(b)man. This has nothing to do with socialization or societal norms and is a general descriptive term. Now when you add in the convoluted idea of gender which is a social construct shit gets real confusing.
Society has developed strict gender roles and limits expression by biological sex which became known as gender and separate from sex. Anyone whose expression falls outside of these norms no longer identify with their gender associated with their sex but gender is just a social construct. Its literally nothing but limitations created by small minded people. Yes, majority of men and women do behave a certain way and prefer certain activities naturally along with having certain skill sets but there are always those who fall outside the “normal” range or the bell curve. Instead of recognizing that over 30% of people will fall outside of the bell curve and knowing it is normal, society shuns them because of their unique expression. The individual begins to think they were born the wrong sex because if they were the other sex then his or her expression would be socially accepted. Now they develop gender dysphoria but gender is not even real. In actuality, they don’t have the problem, society has the problem because gender is a social construct.
FLUIDITY OF EXPRESSION
Every woman expresses her femininity different just as every man expresses their masculinity different. If you are born with a womb you represent the feminine force and if you are born with a penis you represent the masculine force but there are no rules on how you express yourself.
Traditionally people look at masculine and feminine as opposite ends of the spectrum represented by the straight line in the diagram, when it is a circle with points on opposing sides but still connected. The expression is fluid and is one cipher, it can change throughout a person’s lifetime or vary based on their environmental influences. Even how we perceive the cipher can program us to see masculinity as more separate. Simply placing the words masculine and feminine on the inside of the circle makes them appear closer together. Perception is everything and we use norms to help us understand the world. For example, those with penises tend to fall closer to the masculine side and those with wombs tend to fall closer to the feminine side but those are just observations. It is natural for those with common physical characteristics to exhibit other similarities. However society has allowed this to become a limitation. It is a mistake to limit anyone’s expression based on observations of the “norm.” It is also “normal” for over 30% to fall outside of the norm, so what is normal really. We must free our minds and allow for the fluidity of expression for everyone. Society’s rigid rules and a need to fit everything and everyone in a box has created a gender identity crisis. And instead of looking at the root of the problem people have created the idea of gender neutral which is causing more confusion and encouraging people to mutilate perfectly healthy parts of their body in an attempt to fit the norm. This is a sign of a sick society with a harmful culture.
Fuck gender! It isn’t real. What is gender appropriate varies from culture to culture which is proof it is a social construct which has become the source of a lot of hurt and confusion. I understand parents not wanting to limit their children’s expression by their sex but to ignore their biological sex is rejecting a part of their identity. In an attempt to give them freedom to form their own identity parents are not recognizing a very basic, if not the most basic part of their children. A little boy and girl can look at each other naked and clearly see a difference and in a gender neutral culture this difference is not qualified. Just as some people have curly hair and others straight, some of us have wombs & vaginas while others have penises and testes and that is natural. Let’s not deny nature because society has created this limited idea of gender which is completely unnecessary. Those with penises can wear dresses and makeup and are still men by nature and those with wombs can never desire to have children or be a dainty flower and still are women by nature. All expressions are acceptable and represent the range of humanity. There are no limits on our expression and when we attempt to limit our expression we cause psychosis in those who naturally fall outside the limits. Instead of confusing our children and leaving them to figure out the link between biological sex and socialization, lets remove the limits in US culture and do away with social constructs that harm personal expression. Why make more social constructs to counteract other social constructs when we can just get rid of the original social construct. Less is more and simple is better. Bliss and love infinite souls.
Peace & love. I share my thoughts in hopes of helping you find your own. They may take many forms from poetry to essays. However the spirit moves me I will share. Thanks for taking the time to read my thoughts & experiences. This is my truth.